Friday, November 05, 2010

Over/Under

I'm not a betting man, and I'm most definitely not a bookie, but there are a few things that are all but certain to happen in the near future.  The only real question is "how much?", "how many?" or "when?".

The following is for entertainment purposes only - no betting allowed.

...Percentage of the new Republican members of Congress who survive redistricting to win a second term?  75 percent.

...Percentage of the new Republican members of Congress who will face an investigation, indictment or an outright perp walk by the end of a second term?  15 percent (hey, when you elect a bunch of people who thing public service is a dirty, even contemptible, business, many will use that belief to rationalize being dirty and contemptible themselves).

...How long before failed tea party Senate candidate Christine "I am not a witch" O'Donnell appears on "Dancing With The Stars"?  1.5 years.

...How long before "Tea Party Senate President-Elect Russell Pearce" changes the dress code at the Capitol to require members of the Senate to wear sheets and hoods during floor sessions and committee hearings?  2 weeks into the session.

...How long before failed tea party Senate candidate Christine "I am not a witch" O'Donnell receives an offer to appear in the pages of Playboy?  2.5 years.

...How long before Jan Brewer, citing health concerns, resigns from office, leaving Ken Bennett as Arizona's governor?  3 years.

...How long before failed tea party Senate candidate Christine "I am not a witch" O'Donnell *accepts* the offer to appear in the pages of Playboy?  3.5 years.

...How long before there is a widespread grassroots movement supporting a new law to requre registration and licencing of broomsticks3.01 years.

...How long before Russell Pearce bursts out in laughter before killing any bill creating such a law and muttering something about the free market taking care of the problem by offering access to petroleum jelly for those who can pay?  3.02 years.


Anybody want to add their own?

1 comment:

me said...

I don't think O'Donnell gets a gig with DWS. But then again there's Bristol...well, I think the Playboy spread is likely to happen before the DWS. BUT...keeping in mind the witch's ability to remain "the master of her own domain" I'd imagine she'd get an offer from Hustler or Fredricks of Hollywood. blech...